When You See Yourself in a Crowded Room

Back home, one of my favorite things to do is to find a corner of a coffee shop and indulge myself in my work-a-holic world, or on the rare days off, a book. I shove my headphones in my ears (often listening to Steve Jablonsky, A.R. Rahman, or a little of Hans Zimmer), and delve into email answering, blog reading, or paper writing. But here in Kenya, something different happens- if you grab a booth or table by yourself, more often than not, a random stranger will come up and sit across from you, sometimes asking, sometimes not. A smile of welcome, and short introductions ensue. Sometimes you engage in conversation, sometimes you don’t. Maybe a question about the iced coffee, or whether your meal was any good.

Being an introvert and very American when it comes to spacial issues, my concept of personal space and alone-time has been spun on its head in Kenya. If I put my headphones in at work, someone walks by and takes them out, eating alone is rare (example above), and when I go home, Tua and Eric are pulling me this way and that way. Someone is always leaning on you, holding your hand, playing with your hair, or grabbing your arm, conversing and chatting. At first, it was exhausting, and took some time to get used to- it would have been intolerable for me three months ago. I was yearning for time alone, when I could just burrow deep in the confines of my thoughts when I needed to think or contemplate my navel. Yet, now, I’ve kind of grown to like it- there is something more personal, caring, creating a deeper understanding when it comes to interaction between people. A careless arm grab demonstrates a sensitivity to noticing how someone is uncomfortable in their surroundings, the close placement of bodies in a sitting group and hand-holding demonstrates sisterhood when cheering for a teammate. The boundary of air that I have always been so comfortable with when it came to everyone now is so apparent to me when someone isn’t filling it. I don’t mind hugging anymore, which is a BIG woah.

The last few days of work have been completely consumed with working on the questionnaires for Jamii Ya Kibera- there were a few set-backs, which were partly my fault in not always being a clear communicator (lesson of the week, still need to work on the fact not everyone is in my head), partly misunderstandings of what was expected by all parties involved. Yet the Executive Director swooped in and saved the day, and things are going swimmingly. I’m actually really excited now- we are bringing on trained researchers to conduct the questionnaire I developed, 7 in all (along with 7 ‘guides’), to go out and complete the questionnaire on the effectiveness of Jamii Ya Kibera and the post-election violence. I’m kind of in heaven working on this, and can’t wait to see the results. Further, the GHETTO session on public speaking I led went really, really well, and this week we are discussing conflict resolution on a personal level. The girls I am working with are just coming together as a group, so there is often still that hesitancy about being completely open around new people; it was great to see them take up the public speaking activities and put themselves out there, although I think me making a fool of myself by butchering Kiswahili Tongue Twisters probably made them feel like they couldn’t do any worse.

Yesterday, the older girls team raced with Toby, a really awesome guy that is really good friends with Salim, the Executive Director of CFK (this guy has connections like no other-I will forever be slightly envious he is friends with K'naan. Cool side note: he is using a business in Kibera to design a key chain that will be given out to his fans). He started Shoes4Africa, which is also the name of the team. It was a blast- the girls and some of the other boy members with CFK did a 3k around Kibera (I had 200 shillings on the girls winning-by the way, Toby used to be a marathon runner), and I was standing up in the back of Cantar’s pick-up with the video camera, holding on for dear life as I was being whipped around as Cantar drove typical crazy-Kenyan style through the streets of Nairobi. Adrenaline rush to the extreme. At the end, Toby gave out soccer shoes to the girls- after seeing so many of them playing in bare feet the past weeks, it makes you realize how the smallest things can make such a big difference. We also celebrated Salim’s birthday this week, which included Christmas in July and some memorable decorating.

I head to Hell’s Gate National Park tomorrow to camp overnight, and Sunday night to Kalifi (on the coast) with some friends for my 21st birthday on Sunday for three days- so I’ll be out of touch for a while. Until then, kwahiri!